hey michael jackson,

you had some cool songs. You were really good at gliding backwards. When I was 12 Thriller scared the shit out of me and I really liked that song you did with Paul McCartney. I remember one afternoon in 1980something my grandma took me to see your movie 'The Wiz' - well done. Then you caught on fire. You morphed from a black dude to old Asian lady replete with parasol. You claimed to father 2 incredibly blond and downright Aryanesque children (I don't know about that 3rd kid). Then you got their mom(s) to sell them to you. Classy. Very. The only other black people I ever saw you with (besides your family) were Webster and Louis Farrakhan those are some interesting companions. While you may not have been convicted of abusing any children let's not fool ourselves; you were kind of a sick fcuk with your kiddie diddling fixations. You made an absolute fortune over the years, you were the biggest star and an undeniable success. In all those years you were never the spokesperson for any cause. To the best of my recollection, you never championed anyone but yourself.

And now you're dead.


(and for shame, you didn't even outlive Elizabeth Taylor or Liza Minnelli. At least now your son/daughter/kid Blanket has a shot at a 'normal' life. Kudos.)

(some of) the trouble with being nice;

• you will end up dragging around and reinstalling two computers all by your stupid self
• you will have crappy ac in the bedroom for yet another summer
• you will do a lion's share of the work
• you will not get credit
  
• you will never get that money back
• you will be surrounded by poorly dressed and coiffed friends with ghastly significant others
  
• you will end up friendly with people you don't really like
  
• you will smile when you really want to stab
• no one will ever notice it until you're not.

(thanks to Petitedov who reminded me of a conversation she and I had with a friend of ours who's going to practice being less nice).

but the name is stupid

earlier in the week I ordered Murad's acne line from Sephora (despite the fact that they have a store 3 blocks away from my office. Ugh. Ok fine, 2 blocks). When it came in the mail there were all these fun samples including a little trio of Benefit perfumes. Two of the scents were way too strong (I can only do strong in winter and even then I'm pretty finicky - I really like Fresh's Sake in the winter). Well, now I'm in perfume lust. I have to have this.

I would have preferred it if;

• today's pap smear had not felt much the way I imagine a 1950's hanger abortion felt.
• scheduled meetings actually began as scheduled.
  
• dinner simply arrived. Delicious, ordered and paid for.
• the burgeoning zit on my chin unburgeoned.
• instead of moving away, my friends moved closer.
• the Yankees had the lead over the pathetic Nationals.

And I'm actually not bitchy, just super achy and as of 26 minutes ago, vicodined. Ahh... narcotics.

which is nice

sometimes I feel like I never accomplish anything. Then I remember I've already outlived Jesus. So I have that going for me.

random thought

I kinda can't wait to be that batshit-I-don't-at-all-care age where you pick one color and dress head-to-toe in varying hues of it.

It seems really freeing. Much like being freshly released from prison.

mmm... lizard breath

I'm inappropriately excited. You can decide for yourself what that says about me.